When you’re feeling overwhelmed, it can be hard to know what will help you calm down. That’s where a Grounding Kit comes in. A grounding kit (also known as a self-soothe or distress tolerance kit) is a personalized collection of items that engage your senses and offer comfort when you’re feeling stressed or out of control. Think of it like an emotional first aid kit – you put it together ahead of time, so when a difficult moment hits, you have something to turn to that can help you feel safer and more present. This idea is part of DBT’s distress tolerance practices: by preparing soothing items for each of your senses, you’ll be ready to handle emotional storms when they arise. Grounding kits are highly individual – they reflect what helps you feel calm and connected. Keeping one nearby (whether in your bag, car, or bedroom) means you don’t have to rely on willpower alone to cope; you’ll have something to support you right when you need it.

A Grounding Kit typically includes items that engage your senses in a positive way, as sensory input can quickly shift your mood or state of mind. Here are a few examples:

• Sight: A small photo that makes you happy, a calming image (like a peaceful landscape), or an affirmation card. Some people also use a glitter jar or a soothing visual toy. The goal is to have something to look at that reminds you of safety or positive memories.
• Touch: Items with soothing textures – a smooth stone, a stress ball, soft fabric, a tiny stuffed animal, therapy putty, or a fidget toy. Touch can be very grounding, helping you feel anchored in the present moment.
• Sound: A mini music player or playlist of calming songs, a small wind-chime, or a sound-making device. Some kits even include a note with a link to a favorite guided meditation or a recording of a loved one’s voice for reassurance.
• Smell: Scent is a powerful way to calm your mind. You could include travel-sized lotion, essential oils (like lavender for relaxation or peppermint for alertness), a scented candle, or something personal like a scarf with a loved one’s fragrance. Smelling these things can bring a sense of peace or trigger happy memories.
• Taste: Non-perishable snacks or candies – mint or sour candies to bring you back to the present, or a piece of chocolate or herbal tea for comfort. Some people find chewing gum, especially cinnamon-flavored, grounding due to the repetitive motion and strong taste.

Putting your Grounding Kit together can be a therapeutic process in itself. As you think about what items make you feel safe or joyful, you’re creating a tool that will support you when you need it most. There’s no “right” kit – some people add spiritual symbols like a rosary or mantra card, while others include a small journal and pen to jot down thoughts. The main idea is that it’s portable (often stored in a pouch, box, or bag) and contains items that are comforting or grounding to your senses.

Grounding kits are often recommended for people dealing with PTSD or self-harm urges. In a crisis, having your kit ready can be a life-saving tool, helping you to turn to something concrete rather than feeling lost or overwhelmed. Instead of trying to remember what usually helps you calm down, you can simply open your kit and use what’s inside. Over time, using the kit might even become a comforting ritual that signals your brain to start calming down. It’s like your brain starts to associate using your grounding items with finding peace and relaxation.

Don’t forget to add some Vulnerable cards to your kit…

Steps to Create and Use a Grounding Kit

• Gather Items Ahead of Time: Take some time to put your kit together when you’re feeling stable and calm. Think about what helps you feel better when you’re upset, focusing on each of your five senses. For sight, maybe a small photo album or a card with an inspirational quote. For touch, you could add a polished crystal or a squishy toy. For sound, you might want to load a calming playlist onto a mini MP3 player or include headphones with your favorite soothing songs. For smell, a small vial of essential oil or a scented sachet could be just the thing. For taste, consider including a few pieces of candy or tea bags. Make sure everything fits into a container that’s easy to access when needed. You might also want to add something personal, like a letter to yourself, reminding you that feelings pass and you’ll be okay. This could become an encouraging sight item to read when you need it most.
• Choose a Container: Pick something to store your items in – a pouch, box, or bag. Some people use a decorative box at home, while others prefer a zippered cosmetic bag or pencil case if they want to carry it with them. If you plan to use it on the go, make sure the container is portable and not too bulky. You can decorate it with a personal touch, like writing “My Calm Kit” on it or adding a soothing sticker. This simple gesture can make the kit feel even more inviting to use when you need it.
• Keep It Accessible and Updated: Store your kit somewhere you can easily get to it when you need it most. If you tend to feel anxious at work, keep a mini version in your desk drawer or bag. If you experience nightmares in your bedroom, keep it on your nightstand. If you’d like, share the kit’s location with trusted people, so they can hand it to you in a crisis. It’s also a good idea to update your kit from time to time. You might find a new scent you like, or realize you prefer a different stress ball. Keep the items in your kit fresh and relevant to your needs. It’s your personal kit, so make it work for you.
• Use It in Moments of Distress: When you feel distress starting to build – shaking hands, racing thoughts, dissociation, or urges to hurt yourself – reach for your grounding kit as soon as you can. Open it up and use the items one by one. For example, take a deep breath of your favorite scented oil, or hold a smooth, cool rock in your hand, focusing on its texture. Pop a peppermint candy in your mouth and really pay attention to the flavor. Look at a photo that reminds you of your happy place (maybe the beach) and let yourself imagine being there. Put on your headphones and listen to a calming song you’ve included. As you engage with these items, you’re giving your brain signals of safety. And if one item doesn’t seem to help much (maybe your sense of smell is off due to a cold), try another item – touch or taste may work better in that moment. Try to spend a few minutes with your kit, cycling through the items slowly and mindfully.
• Combine with Other Coping Skills: You can use your grounding kit alongside other helpful strategies. For example, while holding an item from your kit, you could also practice slow breathing. Or as you listen to a calming song, you might do some progressive muscle relaxation (PMR). The kit’s role is to help ground you, but it can be even more effective when combined with other techniques. Over time, you might find that just reaching for the kit helps calm you because you’ll begin to associate it with relief. As your ability to self-soothe grows, you may find you don’t need all the items in your kit, but it’s always good to have it as a backup.

Example Scenario

Jordan has a hard time when he gets really overwhelmed – sometimes he feels dissociated or gets the urge to hurt himself. With his therapist’s help, he put together a grounding kit, keeping one in a shoebox at home and a smaller one in his backpack. His kit has things like: a pinecone (for smell and touch), a smooth worry stone (for touch), a music player with his favorite calming songs (for sound), a “10 reasons to stay alive” list he wrote when he was feeling okay (for sight), a photo of his dog (for sight and comfort), peppermint gum (for taste), and a couple of rubber bands (he can snap on his wrist to help ground himself).

One evening, after a fight, Jordan starts feeling the urge to hurt himself. Instead of acting on it, he goes to his room and grabs his grounding kit. First, he rubs the lavender lotion on his hands, breathing in the scent and feeling the smoothness on his skin. He picks up the worry stone, running his fingers over it to calm his hands. Then he puts on his headphones, listens to a gentle guitar track, and focuses on the music. While chewing the peppermint gum, he reads through his “reasons to stay alive” list, reminding himself of the people and things that keep him going, like his little sister, his goals, and his dog who needs him. He feels the tears come, but the urge to hurt himself passes. The combination of soothing things he can touch, smell, hear, and read helps him calm down. Thanks to his grounding kit, Jordan didn’t let the situation get out of control.

Resources

Article: “Create A Sensory Self-Soothing Kit” by Creativity in Therapy (2016). This article provides a detailed guide to assembling a sensory self-soothing kit, focusing on engaging the five senses to promote emotional regulation.

Article: “How to Build a Sensory Self-Soothing Kit” by Megan Anna Neff with Neurodivergent Insights. This resource walks you through the process of creating a personalized self-soothing kit, ensuring that the items cater to your unique sensory preferences.

Article: “How to Make a Self-Soothe Box” by YoungMinds (2019). This article discusses the process of creating a self-soothe box, including suggestions for sensory items and personal mementos to help manage distress.

Article: “Create Your Own Comfort Kit” by Kathy Morelli with Heartlife Holistic Healing (2021). This resource explains how to build a comfort kit using DBT principles, with tips on selecting items for self-soothing during emotional distress.

Article: “Building a Trauma-Informed Grounding Kit” by Lindsay Braman (2021). This article focuses on creating a trauma-informed grounding kit that includes comfort and grounding items to support those experiencing trauma responses.

Article: “What is a Grounding Kit? Learn How to Make This Tool That Can Help with Emotional Regulation” by Heather Hackett (2023). This article offers a comprehensive guide on creating personalized grounding kits, emphasizing the inclusion of sensory items to aid in emotional regulation.